WOMEN IN ISLAM VERSUS
WOMEN IN THE
JUDAEO-CHRISTIAN TRADITION:
THE MYTH
&
THE REALITY
BY
Dr. Sherif Abdel Azeem
CONTENTS
1. INTRODUCTION
2. EVE'S FAULT ?
3. EVE'S LEGACY
4. SHAMEFUL DAUGHTERS ?
5. FEMALE EDUCATION ?
6. UNCLEAN IMPURE WOMAN ?
7. BEARING WITNESS
8. ADULTERY
9. VOWS
10. WIFE'S PROPERTY ?
11. DIVORCE
12. MOTHERS
13. FEMALE INHERITANCE ?
14. PLIGHT OF WIDOWS
15. POLYGAMY
16. THE VEIL
17. EPILOGUE
and Notes
1. INTRODUCTION
Five years ago, I read in the Toronto Star
issue of July 3, 1990 an article titled "Islam is not alone in
patriarchal doctrines", by Gwynne Dyer. The article described
the furious reactions of the participants of a conference on
women and power held in Montreal to the comments of the famous
Egyptian feminist Dr. Nawal Saadawi. Her "politically incorrect"
statements included : "the most restrictive elements towards
women can be found first in Judaism in the Old Testament then in
Christianity and then in the Quran"; "all religions are
patriarchal because they stem from patriarchal societies"; and
"veiling of women is not a specifically Islamic practice but an
ancient cultural heritage with analogies in sister religions".
The participants could not bear sitting around while their
faiths were being equated with Islam. Thus, Dr. Saadawi received
a barrage of criticism. "Dr. Saadawi's comments are
unacceptable. Her answers reveal a lack of understanding about
other people's faiths," declared Bernice Dubois of the World
Movement of Mothers. "I must protest" said panellist Alice
Shalvi of Israel women's network, "there is no conception of the
veil in Judaism." The article attributed these furious protests
to the strong tendency in the West to scapegoat Islam for
practices that are just as much a part of the West's own
cultural heritage. "Christian and Jewish feminists were not
going to sit around being discussed in the same category as
those wicked Muslims," wrote Gwynne Dyer.
I was not surprised that the conference
participants had held such a negative view of Islam, especially
when women's issues were involved. In the West, Islam is
believed to be the symbol of the subordination of women par
excellence. In order to understand how firm this belief is,
it is enough to mention that the Minister of Education in
France, the land of Voltaire, has recently ordered the expulsion
of all young Muslim women wearing the veil from French schools!1
A young Muslim student wearing a headscarf is denied her right
of education in France, while a Catholic student wearing a cross
or a Jewish student wearing a skullcap is not. The scene of
French policemen preventing young Muslim women wearing
headscarves from entering their high school is unforgettable. It
inspires the memories of another equally disgraceful scene of
Governor George Wallace of Alabama in 1962 standing in front of
a school gate trying to block the entrance of black students in
order to prevent the desegregation of Alabama's schools. The
difference between the two scenes is that the black students had
the sympathy of so many people in the U.S. and in the whole
world. President Kennedy sent the U.S. National Guard to force
the entry of the black students. The Muslim girls, on the other
hand, received no help from any one. Their cause seems to have
very little sympathy either inside or outside France. The reason
is the widespread misunderstanding and fear of anything Islamic
in the world today.
What intrigued me the most about the
Montreal conference was one question : Were the statements made
by Saadawi, or any of her critics, factual ? In other words, do
Judaism, Christianity, and Islam have the same conception of
women? Are they different in their conceptions ? Do Judaism and
Christianity , truly, offer women a better treatment than Islam
does? What is the Truth?
It is not easy to search for and find
answers to these difficult questions. The first difficulty is
that one has to be fair and objective or, at least, do one's
utmost to be so. This is what Islam teaches. The Quran has
instructed Muslims to say the truth even if those who are very
close to them do not like it: "Whenever you speak, speak justly,
even if a near relative is concerned" (6:152) "O you who believe
stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as
against yourselves, or your parents or your kin, and whether it
be (against) rich or poor" (4:135).
The other great difficulty is the
overwhelming breadth of the subject. Therefore, during the last
few years, I have spent many hours reading the Bible, The
Encyclopaedia of Religion, and the Encyclopaedia Judaica
searching for answers. I have also read several books discussing
the position of women in different religions written by
scholars, apologists, and critics. The material presented in the
following chapters represents the important findings of this
humble research. I don't claim to be absolutely objective. This
is beyond my limited capacity. All I can say is that I have been
trying, throughout this research, to approach the Quranic ideal
of "speaking justly".
I would like to emphasize in this
introduction that my purpose for this study is not to denigrate
Judaism or Christianity. As Muslims, we believe in the divine
origins of both. No one can be a Muslim without believing in
Moses and Jesus as great prophets of God. My goal is only to
vindicate Islam and pay a tribute, long overdue in the West, to
the final truthful Message from God to the human race. I would
also like to emphasize that I concerned myself only with
Doctrine. That is, my concern is, mainly, the position of women
in the three religions as it appears in their original sources
not as practised by their millions of followers in the world
today. Therefore, most of the evidence cited comes from the
Quran, the sayings of Prophet Muhammad, the Bible, the Talmud,
and the sayings of some of the most influential Church Fathers
whose views have contributed immeasurably to defining and
shaping Christianity. This interest in the sources relates to
the fact that understanding a certain religion from the
attitudes and the behaviour of some of its nominal followers is
misleading. Many people confuse culture with religion, many
others do not know what their religious books are saying, and
many others do not even care.
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2. EVE'S FAULT
?
The three religions agree on one basic
fact: Both women and men are created by God, The Creator of the
whole universe. However, disagreement starts soon after the
creation of the first man, Adam, and the first woman, Eve. The
Judaeo-Christian conception of the creation of Adam and Eve is
narrated in detail in Genesis 2:4-3:24. God prohibited both of
them from eating the fruits of the forbidden tree. The serpent
seduced Eve to eat from it and Eve, in turn, seduced Adam to eat
with her. When God rebuked Adam for what he did, he put all the
blame on Eve, "The woman you put here with me --she gave me some
fruit from the tree and I ate it." Consequently, God said to
Eve:
"I will greatly increase your pains in
childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your
desire will be for your husband and he will rule over you."
To Adam He said:
"Because you listened to your wife and
ate from the tree .... Cursed is the ground because of you;
through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your
life..."
The Islamic conception of the first
creation is found in several places in the Quran, for example:
"O Adam dwell with your wife in the
Garden and enjoy as you wish but approach not this tree or you
run into harm and transgression. Then Satan whispered to them in
order to reveal to them their shame that was hidden from them
and he said: 'Your Lord only forbade you this tree lest you
become angels or such beings as live forever.' And he swore to
them both that he was their sincere adviser. So by deceit he
brought them to their fall: when they tasted the tree their
shame became manifest to them and they began to sew together the
leaves of the Garden over their bodies. And their Lord called
unto them: 'Did I not forbid you that tree and tell you that
Satan was your avowed enemy?' They said: 'Our Lord we have
wronged our own souls and if You forgive us not and bestow not
upon us Your Mercy, we shall certainly be lost' " (7:19:23).
A careful look into the two accounts of
the story of the Creation reveals some essential differences.
The Quran, contrary to the Bible, places equal blame on both
Adam and Eve for their mistake. Nowhere in the Quran can one
find even the slightest hint that Eve tempted Adam to eat from
the tree or even that she had eaten before him. Eve in the Quran
is no temptress, no seducer, and no deceiver. Moreover, Eve is
not to be blamed for the pains of childbearing. God, according
to the Quran, punishes no one for another's faults. Both Adam
and Eve committed a sin and then asked God for forgiveness and
He forgave them both.
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3. EVE'S LEGACY
The image of Eve as temptress in the Bible
has resulted in an extremely negative impact on women throughout
the Judaeo-Christian tradition. All women were believed to have
inherited from their mother, the Biblical Eve, both her guilt
and her guile. Consequently, they were all untrustworthy,
morally inferior, and wicked. Menstruation, pregnancy, and
childbearing were considered the just punishment for the eternal
guilt of the cursed female sex. In order to appreciate how
negative the impact of the Biblical Eve was on all her female
descendants we have to look at the writings of some of the most
important Jews and Christians of all time. Let us start with the
Old Testament and look at excerpts from what is called the
Wisdom Literature in which we find:
"I find more bitter than death the
woman who is a snare, whose heart is a trap and whose hands are
chains. The man who pleases God will escape her, but the sinner
she will ensnare....while I was still searching but not finding,
I found one upright man among a thousand but not one upright
woman among them all" (Ecclesiastes 7:26-28).
In another part of the Hebrew literature
which is found in the Catholic Bible we read:
"No wickedness comes anywhere near the
wickedness of a woman.....Sin began with a woman and thanks to
her we all must die" (Ecclesiasticus 25:19,24).
Jewish Rabbis listed nine curses inflicted
on women as a result of the Fall:
"To the woman He gave nine curses and
death: the burden of the blood of menstruation and the blood of
virginity; the burden of pregnancy; the burden of childbirth;
the burden of bringing up the children; her head is covered as
one in mourning; she pierces her ear like a permanent slave or
slave girl who serves her master; she is not to be believed as a
witness; and after everything--death." 2
To the present day, orthodox Jewish men in
their daily morning prayer recite "Blessed be God King of the
universe that Thou has not made me a woman." The women, on the
other hand, thank God every morning for "making me according to
Thy will." 3 Another prayer found in many Jewish prayer books:
"Praised be God that he has not created me a gentile. Praised be
God that he has not created me a woman. Praised be God that he
has not created me an ignoramus." 4
The Biblical Eve has played a far bigger
role in Christianity than in Judaism. Her sin has been pivotal
to the whole Christian faith because the Christian conception of
the reason for the mission of Jesus Christ on Earth stems from
Eve's disobedience to God. She had sinned and then seduced Adam
to follow her suit. Consequently, God expelled both of them from
Heaven to Earth, which had been cursed because of them. They
bequeathed their sin, which had not been forgiven by God, to all
their descendants and, thus, all humans are born in sin. In
order to purify human beings from their 'original sin', God had
to sacrifice Jesus, who is considered to be the Son of God, on
the cross. Therefore, Eve is responsible for her own mistake,
her husband's sin, the original sin of all humanity, and the
death of the Son of God. In other words, one woman acting on her
own caused the fall of humanity. 5 What about her daughters?
They are sinners like her and have to be treated as such. Listen
to the severe tone of St. Paul in the New Testament:
"A woman should learn in quietness and
full submission. I don't permit a woman to teach or to have
authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed
first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the
woman who was deceived and became a sinner" (I Timothy 2:11-14).
St. Tertullian was even more blunt than
St. Paul, while he was talking to his 'best beloved sisters' in
the faith, he said: 6
"Do you not know that you are each an
Eve? The sentence of God on this sex of yours lives in this age:
the guilt must of necessity live too. You are the Devil's
gateway: You are the unsealer of the forbidden tree: You are the
first deserter of the divine law: You are she who persuaded him
whom the devil was not valiant enough to attack. You destroyed
so easily God's image, man. On account of your desert even the
Son of God had to die."
St. Augustine was faithful to the legacy
of his predecessors, he wrote to a friend:
"What is the difference whether it is
in a wife or a mother, it is still Eve the temptress that we
must beware of in any woman......I fail to see what use woman
can be to man, if one excludes the function of bearing
children."
Centuries later, St. Thomas Aquinas still
considered women as defective:
"As regards the individual nature,
woman is defective and misbegotten, for the active force in the
male seed tends to the production of a perfect likeness in the
masculine sex; while the production of woman comes from a defect
in the active force or from some material indisposition, or even
from some external influence."
Finally, the renowned reformer Martin
Luther could not see any benefit from a woman but bringing into
the world as many children as possible regardless of any side
effects:
"If they become tired or even die, that
does not matter. Let them die in childbirth, that's why they are
there"
Again and again all women are denigrated
because of the image of Eve the temptress, thanks to the Genesis
account. To sum up, the Judaeo-Christian conception of women has
been poisoned by the belief in the sinful nature of Eve and her
female offspring.
If we now turn our attention to what the
Quran has to say about women, we will soon realize that the
Islamic conception of women is radically different from the
Judaeo-Christian one. Let the Quran speak for itself:
"For Muslim men and women, for
believing men and women, for devout men and women, for true men
and women, for men and women who are patient, for men and women
who humble themselves, for men and women who give in charity,
for men and women who fast, for men and women who guard their
chastity, and for men and women who engage much in Allah's
praise-- For them all has Allah prepared forgiveness and great
reward" (33:35).
"The believers, men and women, are
protectors, one of another: they enjoin what is just, and forbid
what is evil, they observe regular prayers, practise regular
charity, and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them will Allah
pour His Mercy: for Allah is Exalted in power, Wise" (9:71).
"And their Lord answered them: Truly I
will never cause to be lost the work of any of you, Be you a
male or female, you are members one of another" (3:195).
"Whoever works evil will not be
requited but by the like thereof, and whoever works a righteous
deed -whether man or woman- and is a believer- such will enter
the Garden of bliss" (40:40).
"Whoever works righteousness, man or
woman, and has faith, verily to him/her we will give a new life
that is good and pure, and we will bestow on such their reward
according to the best of their actions" (16:97).
It is clear that the Quranic view of women
is no different than that of men. They, both, are God's
creatures whose sublime goal on earth is to worship their Lord,
do righteous deeds, and avoid evil and they, both, will be
assessed accordingly. The Quran never mentions that the woman is
the devil's gateway or that she is a deceiver by nature. The
Quran, also, never mentions that man is God's image; all men and
all women are his creatures, that is all. According to the
Quran, a woman's role on earth is not limited only to
childbirth. She is required to do as many good deeds as any
other man is required to do. The Quran never says that no
upright women have ever existed. To the contrary, the Quran has
instructed all the believers, women as well as men, to follow
the example of those ideal women such as the Virgin Mary and the
Pharoah's wife:
"And Allah sets forth, As an example to
those who believe, the wife of Pharaoh: Behold she said: 'O my
lord build for me, in nearness to you, a mansion in the Garden,
and save me from Pharaoh and his doings and save me from those
who do wrong.' And Mary the daughter of Imran who guarded her
chastity and We breathed into her body of Our spirit; and she
testified to the truth of the words of her Lord and of His
revelations and was one of the devout" (66:11-13).
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4. SHAMEFUL
DAUGHTERS ?
In fact, the difference between the
Biblical and the Quranic attitude towards the female sex starts
as soon as a female is born. For example, the Bible states that
the period of the mother's ritual impurity is twice as long if a
girl is born than if a boy is (Lev. 12:2-5). The Catholic Bible
states explicitly that:
"The birth of a daughter is a loss" (Ecclesiasticus
22:3).
In contrast to this shocking statement,
boys receive special praise:
"A man who educates his son will be the
envy of his enemy." (Ecclesiasticus 30:3)
Jewish Rabbis made it an obligation on
Jewish men to produce offspring in order to propagate the race.
At the same time, they did not hide their clear preference for
male children : "It is well for those whose children are male
but ill for those whose are female", "At the birth of a boy, all
are joyful...at the birth of a girl all are sorrowful", and
"When a boy comes into the world, peace comes into the world...
When a girl comes, nothing comes."7
A daughter is considered a painful burden,
a potential source of shame to her father:
"Your daughter is headstrong? Keep a
sharp look-out that she does not make you the laughing stock of
your enemies, the talk of the town, the object of common gossip,
and put you to public shame" (Ecclesiasticus 42:11).
"Keep a headstrong daughter under firm
control, or she will abuse any indulgence she receives. Keep a
strict watch on her shameless eye, do not be surprised if she
disgraces you" (Ecclesiasticus 26:10-11).
It was this very same idea of treating
daughters as sources of shame that led the pagan Arabs, before
the advent of Islam, to practice female infanticide. The Quran
severely condemned this heinous practice:
"When news is brought to one of them of
the birth of a female child, his face darkens and he is filled
with inward grief. With shame does he hide himself from his
people because of the bad news he has had! Shall he retain her
on contempt or bury her in the dust? Ah! what an evil they
decide on?" (16:59).
It has to be mentioned that this sinister
crime would have never stopped in Arabia were it not for the
power of the scathing terms the Quran used to condemn this
practice (16:59, 43:17, 81:8-9). The Quran, moreover, makes no
distinction between boys and girls. In contrast to the Bible,
the Quran considers the birth of a female as a gift and a
blessing from God, the same as the birth of a male. The Quran
even mentions the gift of the female birth first:
" To Allah belongs the dominion of the
heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows
female children to whomever He wills and bestows male children
to whomever He wills" (42:49).
In order to wipe out all the traces of
female infanticide in the nascent Muslim society, Prophet
Muhammad promised those who were blessed with daughters of a
great reward if they would bring them up kindly:
"He who is involved in bringing up
daughters, and accords benevolent treatment towards them, they
will be protection for him against Hell-Fire" (Bukhari and
Muslim).
"Whoever maintains two girls till they
attain maturity, he and I will come on the Resurrection Day like
this; and he joined his fingers" (Muslim).
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5. FEMALE
EDUCATION ?
The difference between the Biblical and
the Quranic conceptions of women is not limited to the newly
born female, it extends far beyond that. Let us compare their
attitudes towards a female trying to learn her religion. The
heart of Judaism is the Torah, the law. However, according to
the Talmud, "women are exempt from the study of the Torah." Some
Jewish Rabbis firmly declared "Let the words of Torah rather be
destroyed by fire than imparted to women", and "Whoever teaches
his daughter Torah is as though he taught her obscenity"8
The attitude of St. Paul in the New
Testament is not brighter:
"As in all the congregations of the
saints, women should remain silent in the churches. They are not
allowed to speak, but must be in submission as the law says. If
they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own
husbands at home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in
the church." (I Corinthians 14:34-35)
How can a woman learn if she is not
allowed to speak? How can a woman grow intellectually if she is
obliged to be in a state of full submission? How can she broaden
her horizons if her one and only source of information is her
husband at home?
Now, to be fair, we should ask: is the
Quranic position any different? One short story narrated in the
Quran sums its position up concisely. Khawlah was a Muslim woman
whose husband Aws pronounced this statement at a moment of
anger: "You are to me as the back of my mother." This was held
by pagan Arabs to be a statement of divorce which freed the
husband from any conjugal responsibility but did not leave the
wife free to leave the husband's home or to marry another man.
Having heard these words from her husband, Khawlah was in a
miserable situation. She went straight to the Prophet of Islam
to plead her case. The Prophet was of the opinion that she
should be patient since there seemed to be no way out. Khawla
kept arguing with the Prophet in an attempt to save her
suspended marriage. Shortly, the Quran intervened; Khawla's plea
was accepted. The divine verdict abolished this iniquitous
custom. One full chapter (Chapter 58) of the Quran whose title
is "Almujadilah" or "The woman who is arguing" was named after
this incident:
"Allah has heard and accepted the
statement of the woman who pleads with you (the Prophet)
concerning her husband and carries her complaint to Allah, and
Allah hears the arguments between both of you for Allah hears
and sees all things...." (58:1).
A woman in the Quranic conception has the
right to argue even with the Prophet of Islam himself. No one
has the right to instruct her to be silent. She is under no
obligation to consider her husband the one and only reference in
matters of law and religion.
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6. UNCLEAN
IMPURE WOMAN ?
Jewish laws and regulations concerning
menstruating women are extremely restrictive. The Old Testament
considers any menstruating woman as unclean and impure.
Moreover, her impurity "infects" others as well. Anyone or
anything she touches becomes unclean for a day:
"When a woman has her regular flow of
blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days,
and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening.
Anything she lies on during her period will be unclean, and
anything she sits on will be unclean. Whoever touches her bed
must wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be
unclean till evening. Whoever touches anything she sits on must
wash his clothes and bathe with water, and he will be unclean
till evening. Whether it is the bed or anything she was sitting
on, when anyone touches it, he will be unclean till evening"
(Lev. 15:19-23).
Due to her "contaminating" nature, a
menstruating woman was sometimes "banished" in order to avoid
any possibility of any contact with her. She was sent to a
special house called "the house of uncleanness" for the whole
period of her impurity. 9 The Talmud considers a menstruating
woman "fatal" even without any physical contact:
"Our Rabbis taught:....if a menstruant
woman passes between two (men), if it is at the beginning of her
menses she will slay one of them, and if it is at the end of her
menses she will cause strife between them" (bPes. 111a.)
Furthermore, the husband of a menstruous
woman was forbidden to enter the synagogue if he had been made
unclean by her even by the dust under her feet. A priest whose
wife, daughter, or mother was menstruating could not recite
priestly blessing in the synagogue. 10 No wonder many Jewish
women still refer to menstruation as "the curse." 11
Islam does not consider a menstruating
woman to possess any kind of "contagious uncleanness". She is
neither "untouchable" nor "cursed." She practises her normal
life with only one restriction: A married couple are not allowed
to have sexual intercourse during the period of menstruation.
Any other physical contact between them is permissible. A
menstruating woman is exempted from some rituals such as daily
prayers and fasting during her period.
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7. BEARING
WITNESS
Another issue in which the Quran and the
Bible disagree is the issue of women bearing witness. It is true
that the Quran has instructed the believers dealing in financial
transactions to get two male witnesses or one male and two
females (2:282). However, it is also true that the Quran in
other situations accepts the testimony of a woman as equal to
that of a man. In fact the woman's testimony can even invalidate
the man's. If a man accuses his wife of unchastity, he is
required by the Quran to solemnly swear five times as evidence
of the wife's guilt. If the wife denies and swears similarly
five times, she is not considered guilty and in either case the
marriage is dissolved (24:6-11).
On the other hand, women were not allowed
to bear witness in early Jewish society. 12 The Rabbis counted
women's not being able to bear witness among the nine curses
inflicted upon all women because of the Fall (see the "Eve's
Legacy" section). Women in today's Israel are not allowed to
give evidence in Rabbinical courts. 13 The Rabbis justify why
women cannot bear witness by citing Genesis 18:9-16, where it is
stated that Sara, Abraham's wife had lied. The Rabbis use this
incident as evidence that women are unqualified to bear witness.
It should be noted here that this story narrated in Genesis
18:9-16 has been mentioned more than once in the Quran without
any hint of any lies by Sara (11:69-74, 51:24-30). In the
Christian West, both ecclesiastical and civil law debarred women
from giving testimony until late last century. 14
If a man accuses his wife of unchastity,
her testimony will not be considered at all according to the
Bible. The accused wife has to be subjected to a trial by
ordeal. In this trial, the wife faces a complex and humiliating
ritual which was supposed to prove her guilt or innocence (Num.
5:11-31). If she is found guilty after this ordeal, she will be
sentenced to death. If she is found not guilty, her husband will
be innocent of any wrongdoing.
Besides, if a man takes a woman as a wife
and then accuses her of not being a virgin, her own testimony
will not count. Her parents had to bring evidence of her
virginity before the elders of the town. If the parents could
not prove the innocence of their daughter, she would be stoned
to death on her father's doorsteps. If the parents were able to
prove her innocence, the husband would only be fined one hundred
shekels of silver and he could not divorce his wife as long as
he lived:
"If a man takes a wife and, after lying
with her, dislikes her and slanders her and gives her a bad
name, saying, 'I married this woman, but when I approached her,
I did not find proof of her virginity,' then the girl's father
and mother shall bring proof that she was a virgin to the town
elders at the gate. The girl's father will say to the elders, 'I
gave my daughter in marriage to this man, but he dislikes her.
Now he has slandered her and said I did not find your daughter
to be a virgin. But here is the proof of my daughter's
virginity.' Then her parents shall display the cloth before the
elders of the town, and the elders shall take the man and punish
him. They shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver and give
them to the girl's father, because this man has given an
Israelite virgin a bad name. She shall continue to be his wife;
he must not divorce her as long as he lives. If, however, the
charge is true and no proof of the girl's virginity can be
found, she shall be brought to the door of her father's house
and there the men of the town shall stone her to death. She has
done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while
still in her father's house. You must purge the evil from among
you." (Deuteronomy 22:13-21)
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8. ADULTERY
Adultery is considered a sin in all
religions. The Bible decrees the death sentence for both the
adulterer and the adulteress (Lev. 20:10). Islam also equally
punishes both the adulterer and the adulteress (24:2). However,
the Quranic definition of adultery is very different from the
Biblical definition. Adultery, according to the Quran, is the
involvement of a married man or a married woman in an
extramarital affair. The Bible only considers the extramarital
affair of a married woman as adultery (Leviticus 20:10,
Deuteronomy 22:22, Proverbs 6:20-7:27).
"If a man is found sleeping with
another man's wife, both the man who slept with her and the
woman must die. You must purge the evil from Israel" (Deut.
22:22).
"If a man commits adultery with another
man's wife both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to
death" (Lev. 20:10).
According to the Biblical definition, if a
married man sleeps with an unmarried woman, this is not
considered a crime at all. The married man who has extramarital
affairs with unmarried women is not an adulterer and the
unmarried women involved with him are not adulteresses. The
crime of adultery is committed only when a man, whether married
or single, sleeps with a married woman. In this case the man is
considered adulterer, even if he is not married, and the woman
is considered adulteress. In short, adultery is any illicit
sexual intercourse involving a married woman. The extramarital
affair of a married man is not per se a crime in the Bible. Why
is the dual moral standard? According to Encyclopaedia Judaica,
the wife was considered to be the husband's possession and
adultery constituted a violation of the husband's exclusive
right to her; the wife as the husband's possession had no such
right to him. 15 That is, if a man had sexual intercourse with a
married woman, he would be violating the property of another man
and, thus, he should be punished.
To the present day in Israel, if a married
man indulges in an extramarital affair with an unmarried woman,
his children by that woman are considered legitimate. But, if a
married woman has an affair with another man, whether married or
not married, her children by that man are not only illegitimate
but they are considered bastards and are forbidden to marry any
other Jews except converts and other bastards. This ban is
handed down to the children's descendants for 10 generations
until the taint of adultery is presumably weakened. 16
The Quran, on the other hand, never
considers any woman to be the possession of any man. The Quran
eloquently describes the relationship between the spouses by
saying:
" And among His signs is that He
created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell
in tranquillity with them and He has put love and mercy between
your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect"
(30:21).
This is the Quranic conception of
marriage: love, mercy, and tranquillity, not possession and
double standards.
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9. VOWS
According to the Bible, a man must fulfil
any vows he might make to God. He must not break his word. On
the other hand, a woman's vow is not necessarily binding on her.
It has to be approved by her father, if she is living in his
house, or by her husband, if she is married. If a father/husband
does not endorse his daughter's/wife's vows, all pledges made by
her become null and void:
"But if her father forbids her when he
hears about it, none of her vows or the pledges by which she
obligated herself will stand ....Her husband may confirm or
nullify any vow she makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself"
(Num. 30:2-15)
Why is it that a woman's word is not
binding per se ? The answer is simple: because she is owned by
her father, before marriage, or by her husband after marriage.
The father's control over his daughter was absolute to the
extent that, should he wish, he could sell her! It is indicated
in the writings of the Rabbis that: "The man may sell his
daughter, but the woman may not sell her daughter; the man may
betroth his daughter, but the woman may not betroth her
daughter." 17 The Rabbinic literature also indicates that
marriage represents the transfer of control from the father to
the husband: "betrothal, making a woman the sacrosanct
possession--the inviolable property-- of the husband..."
Obviously, if the woman is considered to be the property of
someone else, she cannot make any pledges that her owner does
not approve of.
It is of interest to note that this
Biblical instruction concerning women's vows has had negative
repercussions on Judaeo-Christian women till early in this
century. A married woman in the Western world had no legal
status. No act of hers was of any legal value. Her husband could
repudiate any contract, bargain, or deal she had made. Women in
the West (the largest heir of the Judaeo-Christian legacy) were
held unable to make a binding contract because they were
practically owned by someone else. Western women had suffered
for almost two thousand years because of the Biblical attitude
towards women's position vis-�-vis their fathers and husbands.
18
In Islam, the vow of every Muslim, male or
female, is binding on him/her. No one has the power to repudiate
the pledges of anyone else. Failure to keep a solemn oath, made
by a man or a woman, has to be expiated as indicated in the
Quran:
"He [God] will call you to account for
your deliberate oaths: for expiation, feed ten indigent persons,
on a scale of the average for the food of your families; Or
clothe them; or give a slave his freedom. If that is beyond your
means, fast for three days. That is the expiation for the oaths
you have sworn. But keep your oaths" (5:89).
Companions of the Prophet Muhammad, men
and women, used to present their oath of allegiance to him
personally. Women, as well as men, would independently come to
him and pledge their oaths:
"O Prophet, When believing women come
to you to make a covenant with you that they will not associate
in worship anything with God, nor steal, nor fornicate, nor kill
their own children, nor slander anyone, nor disobey you in any
just matter, then make a covenant with them and pray to God for
the forgiveness of their sins. Indeed God is Forgiving and most
Merciful" (60:12).
A man could not swear the oath on behalf
of his daughter or his wife. Nor could a man repudiate the oath
made by any of his female relatives.
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10. WIFE'S
PROPERTY ?
The three religions share an unshakeable
belief in the importance of marriage and family life. They also
agree on the leadership of the husband over the family.
Nevertheless, blatant differences do exist among the three
religions with respect to the limits of this leadership. The
Judaeo-Christian tradition, unlike Islam, virtually extends the
leadership of the husband into ownership of his wife.
The Jewish tradition regarding the
husband's role towards his wife stems from the conception that
he owns her as he owns his slave. 19 This conception has been
the reason behind the double standard in the laws of adultery
and behind the husband's ability to annul his wife's vows. This
conception has also been responsible for denying the wife any
control over her property or her earnings. As soon as a Jewish
woman got married, she completely lost any control over her
property and earnings to her husband. Jewish Rabbis asserted the
husband's right to his wife's property as a corollary of his
possession of her: "Since one has come into the possession of
the woman does it not follow that he should come into the
possession of her property too?", and "Since he has acquired the
woman should he not acquire also her property?" 20 Thus,
marriage caused the richest woman to become practically
penniless. The Talmud describes the financial situation of a
wife as follows:
"How can a woman have anything;
whatever is hers belongs to her husband? What is his is his and
what is hers is also his...... Her earnings and what she may
find in the streets are also his. The household articles, even
the crumbs of bread on the table, are his. Should she invite a
guest to her house and feed him, she would be stealing from her
husband..." (San. 71a, Git. 62a)
The fact of the matter is that the
property of a Jewish female was meant to attract suitors. A
Jewish family would assign their daughter a share of her
father's estate to be used as a dowry in case of marriage. It
was this dowry that made Jewish daughters an unwelcome burden to
their fathers. The father had to raise his daughter for years
and then prepare for her marriage by providing a large dowry.
Thus, a girl in a Jewish family was a liability and no asset. 21
This liability explains why the birth of a daughter was not
celebrated with joy in the old Jewish society (see the "Shameful
Daughters?" section). The dowry was the wedding gift presented
to the groom under terms of tenancy. The husband would act as
the practical owner of the dowry but he could not sell it. The
bride would lose any control over the dowry at the moment of
marriage. Moreover, she was expected to work after marriage and
all her earnings had to go to her husband in return for her
maintenance which was his obligation. She could regain her
property only in two cases: divorce or her husband's death.
Should she die first, he would inherit her property. In the case
of the husband's death, the wife could regain her pre-marital
property but she was not entitled to inherit any share in her
deceased husband's own property. It has to be added that the
groom also had to present a marriage gift to his bride, yet
again he was the practical owner of this gift as long as they
were married. 22
Christianity, until recently, has followed
the same Jewish tradition. Both religious and civil authorities
in the Christian Roman Empire (after Constantine) required a
property agreement as a condition for recognizing the marriage.
Families offered their daughters increasing dowries and, as a
result, men tended to marry earlier while families postponed
their daughters' marriages until later than had been customary.
23 Under Canon law, a wife was entitled to restitution of her
dowry if the marriage was annulled unless she was guilty of
adultery. In this case, she forfeited her right to the dowry
which remained in her husband's hands. 24 Under Canon and civil
law a married woman in Christian Europe and America had lost her
property rights until late nineteenth and early twentieth
centuries. For example, women's rights under English law were
compiled and published in 1632. These 'rights' included: "That
which the husband hath is his own. That which the wife hath is
the husband's." 25 The wife not only lost her property upon
marriage, she lost her personality as well. No act of her was of
legal value. Her husband could repudiate any sale or gift made
by her as being of no binding legal value. The person with whom
she had any contract was held as a criminal for participating in
a fraud. Moreover, she could not sue or be sued in her own name,
nor could she sue her own husband. 26 A married woman was
practically treated as an infant in the eyes of the law. The
wife simply belonged to her husband and therefore she lost her
property, her legal personality, and her family name. 27
Islam, since the seventh century C.E., has
granted married women the independent personality which the
Judaeo-Christian West had deprived them until very recently. In
Islam, the bride and her family are under no obligation
whatsoever to present a gift to the groom. The girl in a Muslim
family is no liability. A woman is so dignified by Islam that
she does not need to present gifts in order to attract potential
husbands. It is the groom who must present the bride with a
marriage gift. This gift is considered her property and neither
the groom nor the bride's family have any share in or control
over it. In some Muslim societies today, a marriage gift of a
hundred thousand dollars in diamonds is not unusual. 28 The
bride retains her marriage gifts even if she is later divorced.
The husband is not allowed any share in his wife's property
except what she offers him with her free consent. 29 The Quran
has stated its position on this issue quite clearly:
"And give the women (on marriage) their
dower as a free gift; but if they, Of their own good pleasure,
remit any part of it to you, take it and enjoy it with right
good cheer" (4:4)
The wife's property and earnings are under
her full control and for her use alone since her, and the
children's, maintenance is her husband's responsibility. 30 No
matter how rich the wife might be, she is not obliged to act as
a co-provider for the family unless she herself voluntarily
chooses to do so. Spouses do inherit from one another. Moreover,
a married woman in Islam retains her independent legal
personality and her family name. 31 An American judge once
commented on the rights of Muslim women saying: " A Muslim girl
may marry ten times, but her individuality is not absorbed by
that of her various husbands. She is a solar planet with a name
and legal personality of her own." 32
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11. DIVORCE
The three religions have remarkable
differences in their attitudes towards divorce. Christianity
abhors divorce altogether. The New Testament unequivocally
advocates the indissolubility of marriage. It is attributed to
Jesus to have said, "But I tell you that anyone who divorces his
wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become
adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits
adultery" (Matthew 5:32). This uncompromising ideal is, without
a doubt, unrealistic. It assumes a state of moral perfection
that human societies have never achieved. When a couple realizes
that their married life is beyond repair, a ban on divorce will
not do them any good. Forcing ill-mated couples to remain
together against their wills is neither effective nor
reasonable. No wonder the whole Christian world has been obliged
to sanction divorce.
Judaism, on the other hand, allows divorce
even without any cause. The Old Testament gives the husband the
right to divorce his wife even if he just dislikes her:
"If a man marries a woman who becomes
displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about
her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her
and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house
she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband
dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it
to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her
first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her
again after she has been defiled" (Deut. 24:1-4).
The above verses have caused some
considerable debate among Jewish scholars because of their
disagreement over the interpretation of the words "displeasing",
"indecency", and "dislikes" mentioned in the verses. The Talmud
records their different opinions:
"The school of Shammai held that a man
should not divorce his wife unless he has found her guilty of
some sexual misconduct, while the school of Hillel say he may
divorce her even if she has merely spoiled a dish for him. Rabbi
Akiba says he may divorce her even if he simply finds another
woman more beautiful than she" (Gittin 90a-b).
The New Testament follows the Shammaites
opinion while Jewish law has followed the opinion of the
Hillelites and R. Akiba. 33 Since the Hillelites view prevailed,
it became the unbroken tradition of Jewish law to give the
husband freedom to divorce his wife without any cause at all.
The Old Testament not only gives the husband the right to
divorce his "displeasing" wife, it considers divorcing a "bad
wife" an obligation:
"A bad wife brings humiliation,
downcast looks, and a wounded heart. Slack of hand and weak of
knee is the man whose wife fails to make him happy. Woman is the
origin of sin, and it is through her that we all die. Do not
leave a leaky cistern to drip or allow a bad wife to say what
she likes. If she does not accept your control, divorce her and
send her away" (Ecclesiasticus 25:25).
The Talmud has recorded several specific
actions by wives which obliged their husbands to divorce them:
"If she ate in the street, if she drank greedily in the street,
if she suckled in the street, in every case Rabbi Meir says that
she must leave her husband" (Git. 89a). The Talmud has also made
it mandatory to divorce a barren wife (who bore no children in a
period of ten years): "Our Rabbis taught: If a man took a wife
and lived with her for ten years and she bore no child, he shall
divorce her" (Yeb. 64a).
Wives, on the other hand, cannot initiate
divorce under Jewish law. A Jewish wife, however, could claim
the right to a divorce before a Jewish court provided that a
strong reason exists. Very few grounds are provided for the wife
to make a claim for a divorce. These grounds include: A husband
with physical defects or skin disease, a husband not fulfilling
his conjugal responsibilities, etc. The Court might
support the wife's claim to a divorce but it cannot dissolve the
marriage. Only the husband can dissolve the marriage by giving
his wife a bill of divorce. The Court could scourge, fine,
imprison, and excommunicate him to force him to deliver the
necessary bill of divorce to his wife. However, if the husband
is stubborn enough, he can refuse to grant his wife a divorce
and keep her tied to him indefinitely. Worse still, he can
desert her without granting her a divorce and leave her
unmarried and undivorced. He can marry another woman or even
live with any single woman out of wedlock and have children from
her (these children are considered legitimate under Jewish law).
The deserted wife, on the other hand, cannot marry any other man
since she is still legally married and she cannot live with any
other man because she will be considered an adulteress and her
children from this union will be illegitimate for ten
generations. A woman in such a position is called an agunah
(chained woman). 34 In the United States today there are
approximately 1000 to 1500 Jewish women who are agunot (plural
for agunah), while in Israel their number might be as high as
16000. Husbands may extort thousands of dollars from their
trapped wives in exchange for a Jewish divorce. 35
Islam occupies the middle ground between
Christianity and Judaism with respect to divorce. Marriage in
Islam is a sanctified bond that should not be broken except for
compelling reasons. Couples are instructed to pursue all
possible remedies whenever their marriages are in danger.
Divorce is not to be resorted to except when there is no other
way out. In a nutshell, Islam recognizes divorce, yet it
discourages it by all means. Let us focus on the recognition
side first. Islam does recognize the right of both partners to
end their matrimonial relationship. Islam gives the husband the
right for Talaq (divorce). Moreover, Islam, unlike Judaism,
grants the wife the right to dissolve the marriage through what
is known as Khula'. 36 If the husband dissolves the marriage by
divorcing his wife, he cannot retrieve any of the marriage gifts
he has given her. The Quran explicitly prohibits the divorcing
husbands from taking back their marriage gifts no matter how
expensive or valuable these gifts might be:
"But if you decide to take one wife in
place of another, even if you had given the latter a whole
treasure for dower, take not the least bit of it back; Would you
take it by slander and a manifest wrong?" (4:20).
In the case of the wife choosing to end
the marriage, she may return the marriage gifts to her husband.
Returning the marriage gifts in this case is a fair compensation
for the husband who is keen to keep his wife while she chooses
to leave him. The Quran has instructed Muslim men not to take
back any of the gifts they have given to their wives except in
the case of the wife choosing to dissolve the marriage:
"It is not lawful for you (Men) to take
back any of your gifts except when both parties fear that they
would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah. There is
no blame on either of them if she give something for her
freedom. These are the limits ordained by Allah so do not
transgress them" (2:229).
Also, a woman came to the Prophet Muhammad
seeking the dissolution of her marriage, she told the Prophet
that she did not have any complaints against her husband's
character or manners. Her only problem was that she honestly did
not like him to the extent of not being able to live with him
any longer. The Prophet asked her: "Would you give him his
garden (the marriage gift he had given her) back?" she said:
"Yes". The Prophet then instructed the man to take back his
garden and accept the dissolution of the marriage (Bukhari).
In some cases, A Muslim wife might be
willing to keep her marriage but find herself obliged to claim
for a divorce because of some compelling reasons such as:
Cruelty of the husband, desertion without a reason, a husband
not fulfilling his conjugal responsibilities, etc. In
these cases the Muslim court dissolves the marriage. 37
In short, Islam has offered the Muslim
woman some unequalled rights: she can end the marriage through
Khula' and she can sue for a divorce. A Muslim wife can never
become chained by a recalcitrant husband. It was these rights
that enticed Jewish women who lived in the early Islamic
societies of the seventh century C.E. to seek to obtain bills of
divorce from their Jewish husbands in Muslim courts. The Rabbis
declared these bills null and void. In order to end this
practice, the Rabbis gave new rights and privileges to Jewish
women in an attempt to weaken the appeal of the Muslim courts.
Jewish women living in Christian countries were not offered any
similar privileges since the Roman law of divorce practiced
there was no more attractive than the Jewish law. 38
Let us now focus our attention on how
Islam discourages divorce. The Prophet of Islam told the
believers that:
"among all the permitted acts, divorce
is the most hateful to God" (Abu Dawood).
A Muslim man should not divorce his wife
just because he dislikes her. The Quran instructs Muslim men to
be kind to their wives even in cases of lukewarm emotions or
feelings of dislike:
"Live with them (your wives) on a
footing of kindness and equity. If you dislike them it may be
that you dislike something in which Allah has placed a great
deal of good" (4:19).
Prophet Muhammad gave a similar
instruction:
" A believing man must not hate a
believing woman. If he dislikes one of her traits he will be
pleased with another" (Muslim).
The Prophet has also emphasized that the
best Muslims are those who are best to their wives:
"The believers who show the most
perfect faith are those who have the best character and the best
of you are those who are best to their wives" (Tirmidthi).
However, Islam is a practical religion and
it does recognize that there are circumstances in which a
marriage becomes on the verge of collapsing. In such cases, a
mere advice of kindness or self restraint is no viable solution.
So, what to do in order to save a marriage in these cases? The
Quran offers some practical advice for the spouse (husband or
wife) whose partner (wife or husband) is the wrongdoer. For the
husband whose wife's ill-conduct is threatening the marriage,
the Quran gives four types of advice as detailed in the
following verses:
"As to those women on whose part you
fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, (1) Admonish them, (2) refuse
to share their beds, (3) beat them; but if they return to
obedience seek not against them means of annoyance: For Allah is
Most High, Great. (4) If you fear a break between them, appoint
two arbiters, one from his family and the other from hers; If
they wish for peace, Allah will cause their reconciliation"
(4:34-35).
The first three are to be tried first. If
they fail, then the help of the families concerned should be
sought. It has to be noted, in the light of the above verses,
that beating the rebellious wife is a temporary measure that is
resorted to as third in line in cases of extreme necessity in
hopes that it might remedy the wrongdoing of the wife. If it
does, the husband is not allowed by any means to continue any
annoyance to the wife as explicitly mentioned in the verse. If
it does not, the husband is still not allowed to use this
measure any longer and the final avenue of the family-assisted
reconciliation has to be explored.
Prophet Muhammad has instructed Muslim
husbands that they should not have recourse to these measures
except in extreme cases such as open lewdness committed by the
wife. Even in these cases the punishment should be slight and if
the wife desists, the husband is not permitted to irritate her:
"In case they are guilty of open
lewdness you may leave them alone in their beds and inflict
slight punishment. If they are obedient to you, do not seek
against them any means of annoyance" (Tirmidthi)
Furthermore, the Prophet of Islam has
condemned any unjustifiable beating. Some Muslim wives
complained to him that their husbands had beaten them. Hearing
that, the Prophet categorically stated that:
"Those who do so (beat their wives) are
not the best among you" (Abu Dawood).
It has to be remembered at this point that
the Prophet has also said:
"The best of you is he who is best to
his family, and I am the best among you to my family" (Tirmidthi).
The Prophet advised one Muslim woman,
whose name was Fatimah bint Qais, not to marry a man because the
man was known for beating women:
"I went to the Prophet and said: Abul
Jahm and Mu'awiah have proposed to marry me. The Prophet (by way
of advice) said: As to Mu'awiah he is very poor and Abul Jahm is
accustomed to beating women" (Muslim).
It has to be noted that the Talmud
sanctions wife beating as chastisement for the purpose of
discipline. 39 The husband is not restricted to the extreme
cases such as those of open lewdness. He is allowed to beat his
wife even if she just refuses to do her house work. Moreover, he
is not limited only to the use of light punishment. He is
permitted to break his wife's stubbornness by the lash or by
starving her. 40
For the wife whose husband's ill-conduct
is the cause for the marriage's near collapse, the Quran offers
the following advice:
"If a wife fears cruelty or desertion
on her husband's part, there is no blame on them if they arrange
an amicable settlement between themselves; and such settlement
is best" (4:128).
In this case, the wife is advised to seek
reconciliation with her husband (with or without family
assistance). It is notable that the Quran is not advising the
wife to resort to the two measures of abstention from sex and
beating. The reason for this disparity might be to protect the
wife from a violent physical reaction by her already misbehaving
husband. Such a violent physical reaction will do both the wife
and the marriage more harm than good. Some Muslim scholars have
suggested that the court can apply these measures against the
husband on the wife's behalf. That is, the court first
admonishes the rebellious husband, then forbids him his wife's
bed, and finally executes a symbolic beating. 41
To sum up, Islam offers Muslim married
couples much viable advice to save their marriages in cases of
trouble and tension. If one of the partners is jeopardizing the
matrimonial relationship, the other partner is advised by the
Quran to do whatever possible and effective in order to save
this sacred bond. If all the measures fail, Islam allows the
partners to separate peacefully and amicably.
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12. MOTHERS
The Old Testament in several places
commands kind and considerate treatment of the parents and
condemns those who dishonor them. For example, "If anyone curses
his father or mother, he must be put to death" (Lev. 20:9) and
"A wise man brings joy to his father but a foolish man despises
his mother" (Proverbs 15:20). Although honoring the father alone
is mentioned in some places, e.g. "A wise man heeds his father's
instruction" (Proverbs 13:1), the mother alone is never
mentioned. Moreover, there is no special emphasis on treating
the mother kindly as a sign of appreciation of her great
suffering in childbearing and suckling. Besides, mothers do not
inherit at all from their children while fathers do. 42
It is difficult to speak of the New
Testament as a scripture that calls for honoring the mother. To
the contrary, one gets the impression that the New Testament
considers kind treatment of mothers as an impediment on the way
to God. According to the New Testament, one cannot become a good
Christian worthy of becoming a disciple of Christ unless he
hates his mother. It is attributed to Jesus to have said:
"If anyone comes to me and does not
hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers
and sisters--yes, even his own life--he can not be my disciple"
(Luke 14:26).
Furthermore, the New Testament depicts a
picture of Jesus as indifferent to, or even disrespectful of,
his own mother. For example, when she had come looking for him
while he was preaching to a crowd, he did not care to go out to
see her:
"Then Jesus' mother and brothers
arrived. Standing outside, they sent someone to call him. A
crowd was sitting around him and they told him, 'Your mother and
brothers are outside looking for you.' 'Who are my mother and my
brothers?' he asked. Then he looked at those seated in a circle
around him and said,' Here are my mother and my brothers!
Whoever does God's will is my brother and sister and mother.' "
(Mark 3:31-35)
One might argue that Jesus was trying to
teach his audience an important lesson that religious ties are
no less important than family ties. However, he could have
taught his listeners the same lesson without showing such
absolute indifference to his mother. The same disrespectful
attitude is depicted when he refused to endorse a statement made
by a member of his audience blessing his mother's role in giving
birth to him and nursing him:
"As Jesus was saying these things, a
woman in the crowd called out, 'Blessed is the mother who gave
you birth and nursed you.' He replied, 'Blessed rather are those
who hear the word of God and obey it.' " (Luke 11:27-28)
If a mother with the stature of the virgin
Mary had been treated with such discourtesy, as depicted in the
New Testament, by a son of the stature of Jesus Christ, then how
should an average Christian mother be treated by her average
Christian sons?
In Islam, the honor, respect, and esteem
attached to motherhood is unparalleled. The Quran places the
importance of kindness to parents as second only to worshipping
God Almighty:
"Your Lord has decreed that you worship
none but Him, And that you be kind to parents. Whether one or
both of them attain old age in your life, Say not to them a word
of contempt, nor repel them, But address them in terms of honor.
And out of kindness, Lower to them the wing of humility, and
say: 'My Lord! bestow on them Your Mercy as they Cherished me in
childhood' " (17:23-24).
The Quran in several other places puts
special emphasis on the mother's great role in giving birth and
nursing:
"And We have enjoined on man to be good
to his parents: In travail upon travail did his mother bear him
and in two years was his weaning. Show gratitude to Me and to
your parents" (31:14).
The very special place of mothers in Islam
has been eloquently described by Prophet Muhammad:
"A man asked the Prophet: 'Whom should
I honor most?' The Prophet replied: 'Your mother'. 'And who
comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your mother'.
'And who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your
mother!'. 'And who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet
replied: 'Your father'" (Bukhari and Muslim).
Among the few precepts of Islam which
Muslims still faithfully observe to the present day is the
considerate treatment of mothers. The honor that Muslim mothers
receive from their sons and daughters is exemplary. The
intensely warm relations between Muslim mothers and their
children and the deep respect with which Muslim men approach
their mothers usually amaze Westerners. 43
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13. FEMALE
INHERITANCE ?
One of the most important differences
between the Quran and the Bible is their attitude towards female
inheritance of the property of a deceased relative. The Biblical
attitude has been succinctly described by Rabbi Epstein: "The
continuous and unbroken tradition since the Biblical days gives
the female members of the household, wife and daughters, no
right of succession to the family estate. In the more primitive
scheme of succession, the female members of the family were
considered part of the estate and as remote from the legal
personality of an heir as the slave. Whereas by Mosaic enactment
the daughters were admitted to succession in the event of no
male issue remained, the wife was not recognized as heir even in
such conditions." 44 Why were the female members of the family
considered part of the family estate? Rabbi Epstein has the
answer: "They are owned --before marriage, by the father; after
marriage, by the husband." 45
The Biblical rules of inheritance are
outlined in Numbers 27:1-11. A wife is given no share in her
husband's estate, while he is her first heir, even before her
sons. A daughter can inherit only if no male heirs exist. A
mother is not an heir at all while the father is. Widows and
daughters, in case male children remained, were at the mercy of
the male heirs for provision. That is why widows and orphan
girls were among the most destitute members of the Jewish
society.
Christianity has followed suit for long
time. Both the ecclesiastical and civil laws of Christendom
barred daughters from sharing with their brothers in the
father's patrimony. Besides, wives were deprived of any
inheritance rights. These iniquitous laws survived till late in
the last century46.
Among the pagan Arabs before Islam,
inheritance rights were confined exclusively to the male
relatives. The Quran abolished all these unjust customs and gave
all the female relatives inheritance shares:
"From what is left by parents and those
nearest related there is a share for men and a share for women,
whether the property be small or large --a determinate share"
(4:7).
Muslim mothers, wives, daughters, and
sisters had received inheritance rights thirteen hundred years
before Europe recognized that these rights even existed. The
division of inheritance is a vast subject with an enormous
amount of details (4:7,11,12,176). The general rule is that the
female share is half the male's except the cases in which the
mother receives equal share to that of the father. This general
rule if taken in isolation from other legislations concerning
men and women may seem unfair. In order to understand the
rationale behind this rule, one must take into account the fact
that the financial obligations of men in Islam far exceed those
of women (see the "Wife's property?" section). A bridegroom must
provide his bride with a marriage gift. This gift becomes her
exclusive property and remains so even if she is later divorced.
The bride is under no obligation to present any gifts to her
groom. Moreover, the Muslim husband is charged with the
maintenance of his wife and children. The wife, on the other
hand, is not obliged to help him in this regard. Her property
and earnings are for her use alone except what she may
voluntarily offer her husband. Besides, one has to realize that
Islam vehemently advocates family life. It strongly encourages
youth to get married, discourages divorce, and does not regard
celibacy as a virtue. Therefore, in a truly Islamic society,
family life is the norm and single life is the rare exception.
That is, almost all marriage-aged women and men are married in
an Islamic society. In light of these facts, one would
appreciate that Muslim men, in general, have greater financial
burdens than Muslim women and thus inheritance rules are meant
to offset this imbalance so that the society lives free of all
gender or class wars. After a simple comparison between the
financial rights and duties of Muslim women, one British Muslim
woman has concluded that Islam has treated women not only fairly
but generously. 47
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14. PLIGHT OF
WIDOWS
Because of the fact that the Old Testament
recognized no inheritance rights to them, widows were among the
most vulnerable of the Jewish population. The male relatives who
inherited all of a woman's deceased husband's estate were to
provide for her from that estate. However, widows had no way to
ensure this provision was carried out, and lived on the mercy of
others. Therefore, widows were among the lowest classes in
ancient Israel and widowhood was considered a symbol of great
degradation (Isaiah 54:4). But the plight of a widow in the
Biblical tradition extended even beyond her exclusion from her
husband's property. According to Genesis 38, a childless widow
must marry her husband's brother, even if he is already married,
so that he can produce offspring for his dead brother, thus
ensuring his brother's name will not die out.
"Then Judah said to Onan, 'Lie with
your brother's wife and fulfill your duty to her as a
brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother' " (Genesis
38:8).
The widow's consent to this marriage is
not required. The widow is treated as part of her deceased
husband's property whose main function is to ensure her
husband's posterity. This Biblical law is still practiced in
today's Israel. 48 A childless widow in Israel is bequeathed to
her husband's brother. If the brother is too young to marry, she
has to wait until he comes of age. Should the deceased husband's
brother refuse to marry her, she is set free and can then marry
any man of her choice. It is not an uncommon phenomenon in
Israel that widows are subjected to blackmail by their
brothers-in-law in order to gain their freedom.
The pagan Arabs before Islam had similar
practices. A widow was considered a part of her husband's
property to be inherited by his male heirs and she was, usually,
given in marriage to the deceased man's eldest son from another
wife. The Quran scathingly attacked and abolished this degrading
custom:
"And marry not women whom your fathers
married--Except what is past-- it was shameful, odious, and
abominable custom indeed" (4:22).
Widows and divorced women were so looked
down upon in the Biblical tradition that the high priest could
not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or a prostitute:
"The woman he (the high priest) marries
must be a virgin. He must not marry a widow, a divorced woman,
or a woman defiled by prostitution, but only a virgin from his
own people, so he will not defile his offspring among his
people" (Lev. 21:13-15)
In Israel today, a descendant of the Cohen
caste (the high priests of the days of the Temple) cannot marry
a divorcee, a widow, or a prostitute. 49 In the Jewish
legislation, a woman who has been widowed three times with all
the three husbands dying of natural causes is considered 'fatal'
and forbidden to marry again. 50 The Quran, on the other hand,
recognizes neither castes nor fatal persons. Widows and
divorcees have the freedom to marry whomever they choose. There
is no stigma attached to divorce or widowhood in the Quran:
"When you divorce women and they fulfil
their terms [three menstruation periods] either take them back
on equitable terms or set them free on equitable terms; But do
not take them back to injure them or to take undue advantage, If
anyone does that, he wrongs his own soul. Do not treat Allah's
signs as a jest" (2:231).
"If any of you die and leave widows
behind, they shall wait four months and ten days. When they have
fulfilled their term, there is no blame on you if they dispose
of themselves in a just manner" (2:234).
"Those of you who die and leave widows
should bequeath for their widows a year's maintenance and
residence. But if they [the widows] leave (the residence) there
is no blame on you for what they justly do with themselves"
(2:240).
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15. POLYGAMY
Let us now tackle the important question
of polygamy. Polygamy is a very ancient practice found in many
human societies. The Bible did not condemn polygamy. To the
contrary, the Old Testament and Rabbinic writings frequently
attest to the legality of polygamy. King Solomon is said to have
had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3) Also, king David
is said to have had many wives and concubines (2 Samuel 5:13).
The Old Testament does have some injunctions on how to
distribute the property of a man among his sons from different
wives (Deut. 22:7). The only restriction on polygamy is a ban on
taking a wife's sister as a rival wife (Lev. 18:18). The Talmud
advises a maximum of four wives. 51 European Jews continued to
practice polygamy until the sixteenth century. Oriental Jews
regularly practiced polygamy until they arrived in Israel where
it is forbidden under civil law. However, under religious law
which overrides civil law in such cases, it is permissible. 52
What about the New Testament? According to
Father Eugene Hillman in his insightful book, Polygamy
reconsidered, "Nowhere in the New Testament is there any
explicit commandment that marriage should be monogamous or any
explicit commandment forbidding polygamy." 53 Moreover, Jesus
has not spoken against polygamy though it was practiced by the
Jews of his society. Father Hillman stresses the fact that the
Church in Rome banned polygamy in order to conform to the
Greco-Roman culture (which prescribed only one legal wife while
tolerating concubinage and prostitution). He cited St.
Augustine, "Now indeed in our time, and in keeping with Roman
custom, it is no longer allowed to take another wife." 54
African churches and African Christians often remind their
European brothers that the Church's ban on polygamy is a
cultural tradition and not an authentic Christian injunction.
The Quran, too, allowed polygamy, but not
without restrictions:
"If you fear that you shall not be able
to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two
or three or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to
deal justly with them, then only one" (4:3).
The Quran, contrary to the Bible, limited
the maximum number of wives to four under the strict condition
of treating the wives equally and justly. It should not be
understood that the Quran is exhorting the believers to practice
polygamy, or that polygamy is considered as an ideal. In other
words, the Quran has "tolerated" or "allowed" polygamy, and no
more, but why? Why is polygamy permissible ? The answer is
simple: there are places and times in which there are compelling
social and moral reasons for polygamy. As the above Quranic
verse indicates, the issue of polygamy in Islam cannot be
understood apart from community obligations towards orphans and
widows. Islam as a universal religion suitable for all places
and all times could not ignore these compelling obligations.
In most human societies, females outnumber
males. In the U.S. there are, at least, eight million more women
than men. In a country like Guinea there are 122 females for
every 100 males. In Tanzania, there are 95.1 males per 100
females. 55 What should a society do towards such unbalanced sex
ratios? There are various solutions, some might suggest
celibacy, others would prefer female infanticide (which does
happen in some societies in the world today !). Others may think
the only outlet is that the society should tolerate all manners
of sexual permissiveness: prostitution, sex out of wedlock,
homosexuality, etc. For other societies , like most
African societies today, the most honorable outlet is to allow
polygamous marriage as a culturally accepted and socially
respected institution. The point that is often misunderstood in
the West is that women in other cultures do not necessarily look
at polygamy as a sign of women's degradation. For example, many
young African brides , whether Christians or Muslims or
otherwise, would prefer to marry a married man who has already
proved himself to be a responsible husband. Many African wives
urge their husbands to get a second wife so that they do not
feel lonely. 56 A survey of over six thousand women, ranging in
age from 15 to 59, conducted in the second largest city in
Nigeria showed that 60 percent of these women would be pleased
if their husbands took another wife. Only 23 percent expressed
anger at the idea of sharing with another wife. Seventy-six
percent of the women in a survey conducted in Kenya viewed
polygamy positively. In a survey undertaken in rural Kenya, 25
out of 27 women considered polygamy to be better than monogamy.
These women felt polygamy can be a happy and beneficial
experience if the co-wives cooperate with each other. 57
Polygamy in most African societies is such a respectable
institution that some Protestant churches are becoming more
tolerant of it. A bishop of the Anglican Church in Kenya
declared that, "Although monogamy may be ideal for the
expression of love between husband and wife, the church should
consider that in certain cultures polygyny is socially
acceptable and that the belief that polygyny is contrary to
Christianity is no longer tenable." 58 After a careful study of
African polygamy, Reverend David Gitari of the Anglican Church
has concluded that polygamy, as ideally practiced, is more
Christian than divorce and remarriage as far as the abandoned
wives and children are concerned. 59 I personally know of some
highly educated African wives who, despite having lived in the
West for many years, do not have any objections against
polygamy. One of them, who lives in the U.S., solemnly exhorts
her husband to get a second wife to help her in raising the
kids.
The problem of the unbalanced sex ratios
becomes truly problematic at times of war. Native American
Indian tribes used to suffer highly unbalanced sex ratios after
wartime losses. Women in these tribes, who in fact enjoyed a
fairly high status, accepted polygamy as the best protection
against indulgence in indecent activities. European settlers,
without offering any other alternative, condemned this Indian
polygamy as 'uncivilised'. 60 After the second world war, there
were 7,300,000 more women than men in Germany (3.3 million of
them were widows). There were 100 men aged 20 to 30 for every
167 women in that age group. 61 Many of these women needed a man
not only as a companion but also as a provider for the household
in a time of unprecedented misery and hardship. The soldiers of
the victorious Allied Armies exploited these women's
vulnerability. Many young girls and widows had liaisons with
members of the occupying forces. Many American and British
soldiers paid for their pleasures in cigarettes, chocolate, and
bread. Children were overjoyed at the gifts these strangers
brought. A 10 year old boy on hearing of such gifts from other
children wished from all his heart for an 'Englishman' for his
mother so that she need not go hungry any longer. 62 We have to
ask our own conscience at this point: What is more dignifying to
a woman? An accepted and respected second wife as in the native
Indians' approach, or a virtual prostitute as in the 'civilised'
Allies approach? In other words, what is more dignifying to a
woman, the Quranic prescription or the theology based on the
culture of the Roman Empire?
It is interesting to note that in an
international youth conference held in Munich in 1948 the
problem of the highly unbalanced sex ratio in Germany was
discussed. When it became clear that no solution could be agreed
upon, some participants suggested polygamy. The initial reaction
of the gathering was a mixture of shock and disgust. However,
after a careful study of the proposal, the participants agreed
that it was the only possible solution. Consequently, polygamy
was included among the conference final recommendations. 63
The world today possesses more weapons of
mass destruction than ever before and the European churches
might, sooner or later, be obliged to accept polygamy as the
only way out. Father Hillman has thoughtfully recognized this
fact, "It is quite conceivable that these genocidal techniques
(nuclear, biological, chemical..) could produce so drastic an
imbalance among the sexes that plural marriage would become a
necessary means of survival....Then contrary to previous custom
and law, an overriding natural and moral inclination might arise
in favour of polygamy. In such a situation, theologians and
church leaders would quickly produce weighty reasons and
biblical texts to justify a new conception of marriage." 64
To the present day, polygamy continues to
be a viable solution to some of the social ills of modern
societies. The communal obligations that the Quran mentions in
association with the permission of polygamy are more visible at
present in some Western societies than in Africa. For example,
In the United States today, there is a severe gender crisis in
the black community. One out of every twenty young black males
may die before reaching the age of 21. For those between 20 and
35 years of age, homicide is the leading cause of death. 65
Besides, many young black males are unemployed, in jail, or on
dope. 66 As a result, one in four black women, at age 40, has
never married, as compared with one in ten white women. 67
Moreover, many young black females become single mothers before
the age of 20 and find themselves in need of providers. The end
result of these tragic circumstances is that an increasing
number of black women are engaged in what is called
'man-sharing'. 68 That is, many of these hapless single black
women are involved in affairs with married men. The wives are
often unaware of the fact that other women are 'sharing' their
husbands with them. Some observers of the crisis of man-sharing
in the African American community strongly recommend consensual
polygamy as a temporary answer to the shortage of black males
until more comprehensive reforms in the American society at
large are undertaken. 69 By consensual polygamy they mean a
polygamy that is sanctioned by the community and to which all
the parties involved have agreed, as opposed to the usually
secret man-sharing which is detrimental both to the wife and to
the community in general. The problem of man-sharing in the
African American community was the topic of a panel discussion
held at Temple University in Philadelphia on January 27, 1993.
70 Some of the speakers recommended polygamy as one potential
remedy for the crisis. They also suggested that polygamy should
not be banned by law, particularly in a society that tolerates
prostitution and mistresses. The comment of one woman from the
audience that African Americans needed to learn from Africa
where polygamy was responsibly practiced elicited enthusiastic
applause.
Philip Kilbride, an American
anthropologist of Roman Catholic heritage, in his provocative
book, Plural marriage for our time, proposes polygamy as a
solution to some of the ills of the American society at large.
He argues that plural marriage may serve as a potential
alternative for divorce in many cases in order to obviate the
damaging impact of divorce on many children. He maintains that
many divorces are caused by the rampant extramarital affairs in
the American society. According to Kilbride, ending an
extramarital affair in a polygamous marriage, rather than in a
divorce, is better for the children, "Children would be better
served if family augmentation rather than only separation and
dissolution were seen as options." Moreover, he suggests that
other groups will also benefit from plural marriage such as:
elderly women who face a chronic shortage of men and the African
Americans who are involved in man-sharing. 71
In 1987, a poll conducted by the student
newspaper at the university of California at Berkeley asked the
students whether they agreed that men should be allowed by law
to have more than one wife in response to a perceived shortage
of male marriage candidates in California. Almost all of the
students polled approved of the idea. One female student even
stated that a polyganous marriage would fulfil her emotional and
physical needs while giving her greater freedom than a
monogamous union. 72 In fact, this same argument is also used by
the few remaining fundamentalist Mormon women who still practice
polygamy in the U.S. They believe that polygamy is an ideal way
for a woman to have both a career and children since the wives
help each other care for the children. 73
It has to be added that polygamy in Islam
is a matter of mutual consent. No one can force a woman to marry
a married man. Besides, the wife has the right to stipulate that
her husband must not marry any other woman as a second wife. 74
The Bible, on the other hand, sometimes resorts to forcible
polygamy. A childless widow must marry her husband's brother,
even if he is already married (see the "Plight of Widows"
section),regardless of her consent (Genesis 38:8-10).
It should be noted that in many Muslim
societies today the practice of polygamy is rare since the gap
between the numbers of both sexes is not huge. One can, safely,
say that the rate of polygamous marriages in the Muslim world is
much less than the rate of extramarital affairs in the West. In
other words, men in the Muslim world today are far more strictly
monogamous than men in the Western world.
Billy Graham, the eminent Christian
evangelist has recognized this fact: "Christianity cannot
compromise on the question of polygamy. If present-day
Christianity cannot do so, it is to its own detriment. Islam has
permitted polygamy as a solution to social ills and has allowed
a certain degree of latitude to human nature but only within the
strictly defined framework of the law. Christian countries make
a great show of monogamy, but actually they practice polygamy.
No one is unaware of the part mistresses play in Western
society. In this respect Islam is a fundamentally honest
religion, and permits a Muslim to marry a second wife if he
must, but strictly forbids all clandestine amatory associations
in order to safeguard the moral probity of the community." 75
It is of interest to note that many,
non-Muslim as well as Muslim, countries in the world today have
outlawed polygamy. Taking a second wife, even with the free
consent of the first wife, is a violation of the law. On the
other hand, cheating on the wife, without her knowledge or
consent, is perfectly legitimate as far as the law is concerned!
What is the legal wisdom behind such a contradiction? Is the law
designed to reward deception and punish honesty? It is one of
the unfathomable paradoxes of our modern 'civilised' world.
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16. THE VEIL
Finally, let us shed some light on what is
considered in the West as the greatest symbol of women's
oppression and servitude, the veil or the head cover. Is it true
that there is no such thing as the veil in the Judaeo-Christian
tradition? Let us set the record straight. According to Rabbi
Dr. Menachem M. Brayer (Professor of Biblical Literature at
Yeshiva University) in his book, The Jewish woman in Rabbinic
literature, it was the custom of Jewish women to go out in
public with a head covering which, sometimes, even covered the
whole face leaving one eye free. 76 He quotes some famous
ancient Rabbis saying," It is not like the daughters of Israel
to walk out with heads uncovered" and "Cursed be the man who
lets the hair of his wife be seen....a woman who exposes her
hair for self-adornment brings poverty." Rabbinic law forbids
the recitation of blessings or prayers in the presence of a
bareheaded married woman since uncovering the woman's hair is
considered "nudity".77 Dr. Brayer also mentions that "During the
Tannaitic period the Jewish woman's failure to cover her head
was considered an affront to her modesty. When her head was
uncovered she might be fined four hundred zuzim for this offense."
Dr. Brayer also explains that veil of the Jewish woman was not
always considered a sign of modesty. Sometimes, the veil
symbolized a state of distinction and luxury rather than
modesty. The veil personified the dignity and superiority of
noble women. It also represented a woman's inaccessibility as a
sanctified possession of her husband. 78
The veil signified a woman's self-respect
and social status. Women of lower classes would often wear the
veil to give the impression of a higher standing. The fact that
the veil was the sign of nobility was the reason why prostitutes
were not permitted to cover their hair in the old Jewish
society. However, prostitutes often wore a special headscarf in
order to look respectable. 79 Jewish women in Europe continued
to wear veils until the nineteenth century when their lives
became more intermingled with the surrounding secular culture.
The external pressures of the European life in the nineteenth
century forced many of them to go out bare-headed. Some Jewish
women found it more convenient to replace their traditional veil
with a wig as another form of hair covering. Today, most pious
Jewish women do not cover their hair except in the synagogue. 80
Some of them, such as the Hasidic sects, still use the wig. 81
What about the Christian tradition? It is
well known that Catholic Nuns have been covering their heads for
hundreds of years, but that is not all. St. Paul in the New
Testament made some very interesting statements about the veil:
"Now I want you to realize that the
head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man,
and the head of Christ is God. Every man who prays or prophesies
with his head covered dishonours his head. And every woman who
prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonours her head
- it is just as though her head were shaved. If a woman does not
cover her head, she should have her hair cut off; and if it is a
disgrace for a woman to have her hair cut off or shaved off, she
should cover her head. A man ought not to cover his head, since
he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of
man. For man did not come from woman, but woman from man;
neither was man created for woman, but woman for man. For this
reason, and because of the angels, the woman ought to have a
sign of authority on her head" (I Corinthians 11:3-10).
St. Paul's rationale for veiling women is
that the veil represents a sign of the authority of the man, who
is the image and glory of God, over the woman who was created
from and for man. St. Tertullian in his famous treatise 'On The
Veiling Of Virgins' wrote, "Young women, you wear your veils out
on the streets, so you should wear them in the church, you wear
them when you are among strangers, then wear them among your
brothers..." Among the Canon laws of the Catholic church today,
there is a law that requires women to cover their heads in
church. 82 Some Christian denominations, such as the Amish and
the Mennonites for example, keep their women veiled to the
present day. The reason for the veil, as offered by their Church
leaders, is that "The head covering is a symbol of woman's
subjection to the man and to God", which is the same logic
introduced by St. Paul in the New Testament. 83
From all the above evidence, it is obvious
that Islam did not invent the head cover. However, Islam did
endorse it. The Quran urges the believing men and women to lower
their gaze and guard their modesty and then urges the believing
women to extend their head covers to cover the neck and the
bosom:
"Say to the believing men that they
should lower their gaze and guard their modesty......And say to
the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard
their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and
ornaments except what ordinarily appear thereof; that they
should draw their veils over their bosoms...." (24:30,31).
The Quran is quite clear that the veil is
essential for modesty, but why is modesty important? The Quran
is still clear:
"O Prophet, tell your wives and
daughters and the believing women that they should cast their
outer garments over their bodies (when abroad) so that they
should be known and not molested" (33:59).
This is the whole point, modesty is
prescribed to protect women from molestation or simply, modesty
is protection. Thus, the only purpose of the veil in Islam is
protection. The Islamic veil, unlike the veil of the Christian
tradition, is not a sign of man's authority over woman nor is it
a sign of woman's subjection to man. The Islamic veil, unlike
the veil in the Jewish tradition, is not a sign of luxury and
distinction of some noble married women. The Islamic veil is
only a sign of modesty with the purpose of protecting women, all
women. The Islamic philosophy is that it is always better to be
safe than sorry. In fact, the Quran is so concerned with
protecting women's bodies and women's reputation that a man who
dares to falsely accuse a woman of unchastity will be severely
punished:
"And those who launch a charge against
chaste women, and produce not four witnesses (to support their
allegations)- Flog them with eighty stripes; and reject their
evidence ever after: for such men are wicked transgressors"
(24:4)
Compare this strict Quranic attitude with
the extremely lax punishment for rape in the Bible:
" If a man happens to meet a virgin who
is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are
discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of
silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can
never divorce her as long as he lives" (Deut. 22:28-30)
One must ask a simple question here, who
is really punished? The man who only paid a fine for rape, or
the girl who is forced to marry the man who raped her and live
with him until he dies? Another question that also should be
asked is this: which is more protective of women, the Quranic
strict attitude or the Biblical lax attitude?
Some people, especially in the West, would
tend to ridicule the whole argument of modesty for protection.
Their argument is that the best protection is the spread of
education, civilised behaviour, and self restraint. We would
say: fine but not enough. If 'civilization' is enough
protection, then why is it that women in North America dare not
walk alone in a dark street - or even across an empty parking
lot ? If Education is the solution, then why is it that a
respected university like Queen's has a 'walk home service'
mainly for female students on campus? If self restraint is the
answer, then why are cases of sexual harassment in the workplace
reported on the news media every day? A sample of those accused
of sexual harassment, in the last few years, includes: Navy
officers, Managers, University professors, Senators, Supreme
Court Justices, and the President of the United States! I could
not believe my eyes when I read the following statistics,
written in a pamphlet issued by the Dean of Women's office at
Queen's University:
- In Canada, a woman is sexually
assaulted every 6 minutes,
- 1 in 3 women in Canada will be sexually
assaulted at some time in their lives,
- 1 in 4 women are at the risk of rape or
attempted rape in her lifetime,
- 1 in 8 women will be sexually assaulted
while attending college or university, and
- A study found 60% of Canadian
university-aged males said they would commit sexual assault if
they were certain they wouldn't get caught.
Something is fundamentally wrong in the
society we live in. A radical change in the society's life style
and culture is absolutely necessary. A culture of modesty is
badly needed, modesty in dress, in speech, and in manners of
both men and women. Otherwise, the grim statistics will grow
even worse day after day and, unfortunately, women alone will be
paying the price. Actually, we all suffer but as K. Gibran has
said, "...for the person who receives the blows is not like the
one who counts them." 84 Therefore, a society like France which
expels young women from schools because of their modest dress
is, in the end, simply harming itself.
It is one of the great ironies of our
world today that the very same headscarf revered as a sign of
'holiness' when worn for the purpose of showing the authority of
man by Catholic Nuns, is reviled as a sign of 'oppression' when
worn for the purpose of protection by Muslim women.
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17. EPILOGUE
The one question all the non-Muslims, who
had read an earlier version of this study, had in common was: do
Muslim women in the Muslim world today receive this noble
treatment described here? The answer, unfortunately, is: No.
Since this question is inevitable in any discussion concerning
the status of women in Islam, we have to elaborate on the answer
in order to provide the reader with the complete picture.
It has to be made clear first that the
vast differences among Muslim societies make most
generalizations too simplistic. There is a wide spectrum of
attitudes towards women in the Muslim world today. These
attitudes differ from one society to another and within each
individual society. Nevertheless, certain general trends are
discernible. Almost all Muslim societies have, to one degree or
another, deviated from the ideals of Islam with respect to the
status of women. These deviations have, for the most part, been
in one of two opposite directions. The first direction is more
conservative, restrictive, and traditions-oriented, while the
second is more liberal and Western-oriented.
The societies that have digressed in the
first direction treat women according to the customs and
traditions inherited from their forebears. These traditions
usually deprive women of many rights granted to them by Islam.
Besides, women are treated according to standards far different
from those applied to men. This discrimination pervades the life
of any female: she is received with less joy at birth than a
boy; she is less likely to go to school; she might be deprived
any share of her family's inheritance; she is under continuous
surveillance in order not to behave immodestly while her
brother's immodest acts are tolerated; she might even be killed
for committing what her male family members usually boast of
doing; she has very little say in family affairs or community
interests; she might not have full control over her property and
her marriage gifts; and finally as a mother she herself would
prefer to produce boys so that she can attain a higher status in
her community.
On the other hand, there are Muslim
societies (or certain classes within some societies) that have
been swept over by the Western culture and way of life. These
societies often imitate unthinkingly whatever they receive from
the West and usually end up adopting the worst fruits of Western
civilization. In these societies, a typical "modern" woman's top
priority in life is to enhance her physical beauty. Therefore,
she is often obsessed with her body's shape, size, and weight.
She tends to care more about her body than her mind and more
about her charms than her intellect. Her ability to charm,
attract, and excite is more valued in the society than her
educational achievements, intellectual pursuits, and social
work. One is not expected to find a copy of the Quran in her
purse since it is full of cosmetics that accompany her wherever
she goes. Her spirituality has no room in a society preoccupied
with her attractiveness. Therefore, she would spend her life
striving more to realize her femininity than to fulfil her
humanity.
Why did Muslim societies deviate from the
ideals of Islam? There is no easy answer. A penetrating
explanation of the reasons why Muslims have not adhered to the
Quranic guidance with respect to women would be beyond the scope
of this study. It has to be made clear, however, that Muslim
societies have deviated from the Islamic precepts concerning so
many aspects of their lives for so long. There is a wide gap
between what Muslims are supposed to believe in and what they
actually practice. This gap is not a recent phenomenon. It has
been there for centuries and has been widening day after day.
This ever widening gap has had disastrous consequences on the
Muslim world manifested in almost all aspects of life: political
tyranny and fragmentation, economic backwardness, social
injustice, scientific bankruptcy, intellectual stagnation,
etc. The non-Islamic status of women in the Muslim world
today is merely a symptom of a deeper malady. Any reform in the
current status of Muslim women is not expected to be fruitful if
not accompanied with more comprehensive reforms of the Muslim
societies' whole way of life. The Muslim world is in need for a
renaissance that will bring it closer to the ideals of Islam and
not further from them. To sum up, the notion that the poor
status of Muslim women today is because of Islam is an utter
misconception. The problems of Muslims in general are not due to
too much attachment to Islam, they are the culmination of a long
and deep detachment from it.
It has, also, to be re-emphasized that the
purpose behind this comparative study is not, by any means, to
defame Judaism or Christianity. The position of women in the
Judaeo-Christian tradition might seem frightening by our late
twentieth century standards. Nevertheless, it has to be viewed
within the proper historical context. In other words, any
objective assessment of the position of women in the
Judaeo-Christian tradition has to take into account the
historical circumstances in which this tradition developed.
There can be no doubt that the views of the Rabbis and the
Church Fathers regarding women were influenced by the prevalent
attitudes towards women in their societies. The Bible itself was
written by different authors at different times. These authors
could not have been impervious to the values and the way of life
of the people around them. For example, the adultery laws of the
Old Testament are so biased against women that they defy
rational explanation by our mentality. However, if we consider
the fact that the early Jewish tribes were obsessed with their
genetic homogeneity and extremely eager to define themselves
apart from the surrounding tribes and that only sexual
misconduct by the married females of the tribes could threaten
these cherished aspirations, we should then be able to
understand, but not necessarily sympathize with, the reasons for
this bias. Also, the diatribes of the Church Fathers against
women should not be detached from the context of the misogynist
Greco-Roman culture in which they lived. It would be unfair to
evaluate the Judaeo-Christian legacy without giving any
consideration to the relevant historical context.
In fact, a proper understanding of the
Judaeo-Christian historical context is also crucial for
understanding the significance of the contributions of Islam to
world history and human civilization. The Judaeo-Christian
tradition had been influenced and shaped by the environments,
conditions, and cultures in which it had existed. By the seventh
century C.E., this influence had distorted the original divine
message revealed to Moses and Jesus beyond recognition. The poor
status of women in the Judaeo-Christian world by the seventh
century is just one case in point. Therefore, there was a great
need for a new divine message that would guide humanity back to
the straight path. The Quran described the mission of the new
Messenger as a release for Jews and Christians from the heavy
burdens that had been upon them: "Those who follow the
Messenger, the unlettered Prophet, whom they find mentioned in
their own Scriptures--In the Law and the Gospel-- For he
commands them what is just and forbids them what is evil; he
allows them as lawful what is good and prohibits them from what
is bad; He releases them from their heavy burdens and from the
yokes that are upon them" (7:157).
Therefore, Islam should not be viewed as a
rival tradition to Judaism or Christianity. It has to be
regarded as the consummation, completion, and perfection of the
divine messages that had been revealed before it.
At the end of this study, I would like to
offer the following advice to the global Muslim community. So
many Muslim women have been denied their basic Islamic rights
for so long. The mistakes of the past have to be corrected. To
do that is not a favor, it is a duty incumbent upon all Muslims.
The worldwide Muslim community have to issue a charter of Muslim
women's rights based on the instructions of the Quran and the
teachings of the Prophet of Islam. This charter must give Muslim
women all the rights endowed to them by their Creator. Then, all
the necessary means have to be developed in order to ensure the
proper implementation of the charter. This charter is long
overdue, but it is better late than never. If Muslims worldwide
will not guarantee the full Islamic rights of their mothers,
wives, sisters, and daughters, who else will ?
Furthermore, we must have the courage to
confront our past and reject outright the traditions and customs
of our forefathers whenever they contravene the precepts of
Islam. Did the Quran not severely criticize the pagan Arabs for
blindly following the traditions of their ancestors? On the
other hand, we have to develop a critical attitude towards
whatever we receive from the West or from any other culture.
Interaction with and learning from other cultures is an
invaluable experience. The Quran has succinctly considered this
interaction as one of the purposes of creation: " O mankind We
created you from a single pair of a male and a female, and made
you into nations and tribes, that you may know each other"
(49:13). It goes without saying, however, that blind imitation
of others is a sure sign of an utter lack of self-esteem.
It is to the non-Muslim reader, Jewish,
Christian, or otherwise, that these final words are dedicated.
It is bewildering why the religion that had revolutionized the
status of women is being singled out and denigrated as so
repressive of women. This perception about Islam is one of the
most widespread myths in our world today. This myth is being
perpetuated by a ceaseless barrage of sensational books,
articles, media images, and Hollywood movies. The inevitable
outcome of these incessant misleading images has been total
misunderstanding and fear of anything related to Islam. This
negative portrayal of Islam in the world media has to end if we
are to live in a world free from all traces of discrimination,
prejudice, and misunderstanding. Non-Muslims ought to realize
the existence of a wide gap between Muslims' beliefs and
practices and the simple fact that the actions of Muslims do not
necessarily represent Islam. To label the status of women in the
Muslim world today as "Islamic" is as far from the truth as
labelling the position of women in the West today as
"Judaeo-Christian". With this understanding in mind, Muslims and
non-Muslims should start a process of communication and dialogue
in order to remove all misconceptions, suspicions, and fears. A
peaceful future for the human family necessitates such a
dialogue.
Islam should be viewed as a religion that
had immensely improved the status of women and had granted them
many rights that the modern world has recognized only this
century. Islam still has so much to offer today's woman:
dignity, respect, and protection in all aspects and all stages
of her life from birth until death in addition to the
recognition, the balance, and means for the fulfilment of all
her spiritual, intellectual, physical, and emotional needs. No
wonder most of those who choose to become Muslims in a country
like Britain are women. In the U.S. women converts to Islam
outnumber male converts 4 to 1. 85 Islam has so much to offer
our world which is in great need of moral guidance and
leadership. Ambassador Herman Eilts, in a testimony in front of
the committee on Foreign Affairs of the House of Representatives
of the United States Congress on June 24th, 1985, said, "The
Muslim community of the globe today is in the neighbourhood of
one billion. That is an impressive figure. But what to me is
equally impressive is that Islam today is the fastest growing
monotheistic religion. This is something we have to take into
account. Something is right about Islam. It is attracting a good
many people." Yes, something is right about Islam and it is time
to find that out. I hope this study is a step on this direction.
Back
NOTES
1. The Globe and Mail, Oct. 4,1994.
2. Leonard J. Swidler, Women in Judaism:
the Status of Women in Formative Judaism (Metuchen, N.J:
Scarecrow Press, 1976) p. 115.
3. Thena Kendath, "Memories of an Orthodox
youth" in Susannah Heschel, ed. On being a Jewish Feminist (New
York: Schocken Books, 1983), pp. 96-97.
4. Swidler, op. cit., pp. 80-81.
5. Rosemary R. Ruether, "Christianity", in
Arvind Sharma, ed., Women in World Religions (Albany: State
University of New York Press, 1987) p. 209.
6. For all the sayings of the prominent
Saints, see Karen Armstrong, The Gospel According to Woman
(London: Elm Tree Books, 1986) pp. 52-62. See also Nancy van
Vuuren, The Subversion of Women as Practiced by Churches,
Witch-Hunters, and Other Sexists (Philadelphia: Westminister
Press) pp. 28-30.
7. Swidler, op. cit., p. 140.
8. Denise L. Carmody, "Judaism", in Arvind
Sharma, ed., op. cit., p. 197.
9. Swidler, op. cit., p. 137.
10. Ibid., p. 138.
11. Sally Priesand, Judaism and the New
Woman (New York: Behrman House, Inc., 1975) p. 24.
12. Swidler, op. cit., p. 115.
13. Lesley Hazleton, Israeli Women The
Reality Behind the Myths (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1977) p.
41.
14. Gage, op. cit. p. 142.
15. Jeffrey H. Togay, "Adultery,"
Encyclopaedia Judaica, Vol. II, col. 313. Also, see Judith
Plaskow, Standing Again at Sinai: Judaism from a Feminist
Perspective (New York: Harper & Row Publishers, 1990) pp.
170-177.
16. Hazleton, op. cit., pp. 41-42.
17. Swidler, op. cit., p. 141.
18. Matilda J. Gage, Woman, Church, and
State (New York: Truth Seeker Company, 1893) p. 141.
19. Louis M. Epstein, The Jewish Marriage
Contract (New York: Arno Press, 1973) p. 149.
20. Swidler, op. cit., p. 142.
21. Epstein, op. cit., pp. 164-165.
22. Ibid., pp. 112-113. See also Priesand,
op. cit., p. 15.
23. James A. Brundage, Law, Sex, and
Christian Society in Medieval Europe ( Chicago: University of
Chicago Press, 1987) p. 88.
24. Ibid., p. 480.
25. R. Thompson, Women in Stuart England
and America (London: Routledge & Kegan Paul, 1974) p. 162.
26. Mary Murray, The Law of the Father
(London: Routledge, 1995) p. 67.
27. Gage, op. cit., p. 143.
28. For example, see Jeffrey Lang,
Struggling to Surrender, (Beltsville, MD: Amana Publications,
1994) p. 167.
29. Elsayyed Sabiq, Fiqh al Sunnah (Cairo:
Darul Fatah lile'lam Al-Arabi, 11th edition, 1994), vol. 2, pp.
218-229.
30. Abdel-Haleem Abu Shuqqa, Tahreer al
Mar'aa fi Asr al Risala (Kuwait: Dar al Qalam, 1990) pp.
109-112.
31. Leila Badawi, "Islam", in Jean Holm
and John Bowker, ed., Women in Religion (London: Pinter
Publishers, 1994) p. 102.
32. Amir H. Siddiqi, Studies in Islamic
History (Karachi: Jamiyatul Falah Publications, 3rd edition,
1967) p. 138.
33. Epstein, op. cit., p. 196.
34. Swidler, op. cit., pp. 162-163.
35. The Toronto Star, Apr. 8, 1995.
36. Sabiq, op. cit., pp. 318-329. See also
Muhammad al Ghazali, Qadaya al Mar'aa bin al Taqaleed al Rakida
wal Wafida (Cairo: Dar al Shorooq, 4th edition, 1992) pp.
178-180.
37. Ibid., pp. 313-318.
38. David W. Amram, The Jewish Law of
Divorce According to Bible and Talmud ( Philadelphia: Edward
Stern & CO., Inc., 1896) pp. 125-126.
39. Epstein, op. cit., p. 219.
40. Ibid, pp 156-157.
41. Muhammad Abu Zahra, Usbu al Fiqh al
Islami (Cairo: al Majlis al A'la li Ri'ayat al Funun, 1963) p.
66.
42. Epstein, op. cit., p. 122.
43. Armstrong, op. cit., p. 8.
44. Epstein, op. cit., p. 175.
45. Ibid., p. 121.
46. Gage, op. cit., p. 142.
47. B. Aisha Lemu and Fatima Heeren, Woman
in Islam (London: Islamic Foundation, 1978) p. 23.
48. Hazleton, op. cit., pp. 45-46.
49. Ibid., p. 47.
50. Ibid., p. 49.
51. Swidler, op. cit., pp. 144-148.
52. Hazleton, op. cit., pp 44-45.
53. Eugene Hillman, Polygamy Reconsidered:
African Plural Marriage and the Christian Churches (New York:
Orbis Books, 1975) p. 140.
54. Ibid., p. 17.
55. Ibid., pp. 88-93.
56. Ibid., pp. 92-97.
57. Philip L. Kilbride, Plural Marriage
For Our Times (Westport, Conn.: Bergin & Garvey, 1994) pp.
108-109.
58. The Weekly Review, Aug. 1, 1987.
59. Kilbride, op. cit., p. 126.
60. John D'Emilio and Estelle B. Freedman,
Intimate Matters: A history of Sexuality in America (New York:
Harper & Row Publishers, 1988) p. 87.
61. Ute Frevert, Women in German History:
from Bourgeois Emancipation to Sexual Liberation (New York: Berg
Publishers, 1988) pp. 263-264.
62. Ibid., pp. 257-258.
63. Sabiq, op. cit., p. 191.
64. Hillman, op. cit., p. 12.
65. Nathan Hare and Julie Hare, ed.,
Crisis in Black Sexual Politics (San Francisco: Black Think
Tank, 1989) p. 25.
66. Ibid., p. 26.
67. Kilbride, op. cit., p. 94.
68. Ibid., p. 95.
69. Ibid.
70. Ibid., pp. 95-99.
71. Ibid., p. 118.
72. Lang, op. cit., p. 172.
73. Kilbride, op. cit., pp. 72-73.
74. Sabiq, op. cit., pp. 187-188.
75. Abdul Rahman Doi, Woman in Shari'ah
(London: Ta-Ha Publishers, 1994) p. 76.
76. Menachem M. Brayer, The Jewish Woman
in Rabbinic Literature: A Psychosocial Perspective (Hoboken, N.J:
Ktav Publishing House, 1986) p. 239.
77. Ibid., pp. 316-317. Also see Swidler,
op. cit., pp. 121-123.
78. Ibid., p. 139.
79. Susan W. Schneider, Jewish and Female
(New York: Simon & Schuster, 1984) p. 237.
80. Ibid., pp. 238-239.
81. Alexandra Wright, "Judaism", in Holm
and Bowker, ed., op. cit., pp. 128-129
82. Clara M. Henning, "Cannon Law and the
Battle of the Sexes" in Rosemary R. Ruether, ed., Religion and
Sexism: Images of Woman in the Jewish and Christian Traditions
(New York: Simon and Schuster, 1974) p. 272.
83. Donald B. Kraybill, The riddle of the
Amish Culture (Baltimore: Johns Hopkins University Press, 1989)
p. 56.
84. Khalil Gibran, Thoughts and
Meditations (New York: Bantam Books, 1960) p. 28.
85. The Times, Nov. 18, 1993.
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